Do you have a ‘work-spouse’?

Do you have a ‘work-spouse’?

More usually, work and home are seen as being a disruptive influence on each other: working couples struggle to balance responsibilities, who’s dropping the kids at school, and what happens when someone has to work late?

Researchers at the University of Bath (alongside IESE Business School and Vrije Universiteit in the Netherlands) studied the experiences of 260 couples where both partners were working. The purpose of the research had been to discover what happens when it comes to sharing out chores — and then where couples look for support when they are feeling under stress or worried about work/life clashes.

Love and the co-worker

Rather than going to talk about work/life balance issues with a manager, it was found that colleagues were far more important for support and advice. These are what the researchers refer to as ‘work-spouses’.

“They are the starting point of what we call a ‘gain spiral’, in which the benefits of a supportive relationship with colleagues then transfers to an employee’s home life, where they are subsequently shared with a partner,” say the researchers.

“In the other direction, a loving relationship at home is likely to translate into greater dedication and creativity in the work place.  if you’re happy at work, you’ll be happier at home, which in turn will make you better at your job.”

Caring spiral

“Most often, home and work lives have been thought of as acting against each other. Conflict in one place leads to trouble in the other,” suggests EAPA UK chair Eugene Farrell.

“It’s useful to think about the other side of the picture and how good practices of caring and support lead to a virtuous circle. EAPs play an important part in this kind of culture. People know they always have someone to speak to, they can open up and move forward. And that’s such a fundamental principle for working couples to catch problems early and start conversations before things escalate or fester. Employers can only ever benefit from a cycle of positive feelings and experiences in terms of satisfaction and productivity.”

Do you have a ‘work-spouse’? – EAPA UK