The ‘quiet crisis’ of men at work

The ‘quiet crisis’ of men at work

“We’re told to toughen up, but a bit too much, and it’s toxic. We’re told to soften, but too much of that and it’s weak and unattractive,” writes George Bell in a new book, Be a Man About It: Building A Healthier Idea Of Masculinity.

The handed down version of masculinity, he says, has led to a version that stresses “emotional suppression, rather than expression.” And that’s at the core of reasons why men are three times more likely to take their own life than women — as well as being more likely to have a premature death, and to suffer from addictions, loneliness, homelessness and crime.

Too quick to label things toxic?

A campaigner on men’s mental health, Bell has himself experienced a slide into depression and suicidal thoughts.

“I was willing to trade my own life in order to preserve this notion of masculine pride. To get better, to recover, and to still be here today, I had to not only work through the mental health side but I also had to almost entirely deconstruct and then rebuild my sense of what it means to be a man…this isn’t about criticising or shutting down parts of masculinity that many men find so valuable. I believe we have gone too far in some discourse in recent years, too quick to label things toxic and shut down many parts of masculinity that men enjoy or aspire to have.”

EAPs for opening up

EAPA UK chair, Karl Bennett said: “All the experience of EAPs over decades backs up the data from the NHS showing how women are more likely to engage with their GP and other health providers and more likely to open up about their health concerns.

“In principle, EAPs are a perfect way to help more men. A professional and confidential service, accessible through their workplace, but independent from it. But more work needs to be done in raising awareness of when and how EAPs can be used, that they aren’t just there for when situations have reached a crisis point. Working together, talking to an EAP about mental health or root issues such as financial and relationship problems can be made to feel more ‘normal’.”